anglosexual:

chickensandwich:

i hate when couples say “we’re pregnant” because there is a very slim chance that they are both pregnant

liberteabel:

vvorldwideweb:

what if paper screamed every word you wrote back at you

Then paper written fanfiction would be quite hilarious.

i thought of you, while in the shower

and i thought of how nice it’d be

to have your things among my things

along the bathtub’s edge

and i imagined myself running out of soap

and using yours

and wearing you to work, and the grocery store

and i imagined that night, laying down beside you

and smelling your neck

and finding out where all my soap had gone

deucebowl:

How the FUCK am I supposed to have a good day when 28% of Americans aren’t getting enough fiber?